11.11.11

I cannot believe that my baby is already 2 months. It seems like just yesterday he was born, yet time has flown by so fast. It hits me everyday how he won't be this little very much longer...I wish time would stay still so we could live in these moments as long as we wanted to. He is so precious and curious of the world he lives in. He talks a lot and sometimes we actually have conversations. I hear talking to them at an early age and trying to get them to imitate your noises is a good exercise.

It was hard going back to work full-time. I cried the week before knowing I would be leaving him everyday for at least 8 hours. This Monday I knew that he knew I had to leave him again. He is so happy every morning, but when it is time for me to tell him good-bye he gets real quiet and gives me a funny look. Then when I finally get home to him you can tell he has been missing me. If he is awake there are signs he wants to be in my arms. He'll flail his arms as he moves his body up and down as if to let me know to pick him up. It is the cutest ever. Or he'll smile real big when he hears my voice. It makes me happy in the moment, but it breaks my heart that I leave him feeling like that. I hope in some small fraction he knows that I don't want to leave and that it is just routine, but that I always go back. I would hate to leave him if he thought I was never coming back....so I'll try not to think about that.

On a another note, Thanksgiving is coming up and I am SO ready for the yummy food. I have to find a cute outfit for Jack to wear. I also need to start buying jackets, winter hats and gloves. So excited for my brother and cousin to finally meet him!! I think I might cry when I see their reactions. Especially my brothers.

Well, today is a good day and I am blessed!

I'm a Mama!

So I had my precious baby boy 9/11/11 (he wouldn't be my son if he didn't make a big entrance lol) at 3:39am. He was 7 lbs 11 oz and 20 inches long. He came out with a head full of hair and very light skinned. And his full name is Jack Dylan Munguia. When I explain my "labor story" other mothers gasp at how easy I had it. No Pain. No Contractions. No Complications. The only thing that freaked me out was once the nurse told me I was dilated to 10 centimeters I started to get uncontrollable shakes. Had I not been in labor people would have thought I was having a seizure - that bad! They calmed down once the baby arrived.

 



 I may not know what labor pains feel like, but the whole delivery experience is indescribable. I get butterflies when I relive the moments of my baby's first cry and when they laid him on my chest. He melted my heart and has every day since then. It's hard to even find the words to describe how I felt and how I feel every day knowing our baby is here, perfect and beautiful. I love being his mother. He is so precious.






It's funny, when a woman is pregnant there is no real way of finding out what the baby will look like, but in some weird way I couldn't imagine Jack looking any other way. Its like my heart knew. The perfect combination of us.

Being a mother is hands down the best feeling in the world.

He is almost here....

Well, I am 38 weeks and am dilated to 1.7. I am hoping Jack waits at least another week to make his appearance, but my doctor says he can come at any time. It is crazy how fast time has flown by. He is almost here and I am filled with so many emotions right now.

I started to pack my hospital bag last night and already have Jack's outfits picked out...lol. He is going to be the cutest baby ever! I cannot wait to hold him.

Baby showers were a success! Had three total and both Ram and I are so grateful for all the love and support so many family members and friends have shown us. Jack is surrounded by so much love.

6 weeks left!

It amazes me how fast time has flown by. Our little man is almost here and we are so excited! He moves all the time now and I am already used to it. However, his hiccups do get on my nerves....is that awful to say? I'm so in love though. He has stolen my heart in a way no one else ever will. I keep thinking about the first moment we will meet and when they place him in my arms - oh, what a wonderful feeling I get just thinking about it. It has to be ten times better.

I am already forgotten! As soon as I walk through the door the baby gets more attention and he's still in my belly. It is at the point where my 4-year old cousin didn't even invite me to her birthday party this past weekend, ONLY baby Jack was invited. lol. He has no idea how much he is already loved.

Giddy

We are finally moved into our home and settling in great! A little more organizing and unpacking still needs to be done, but it will get done. Some decorating is necessary too and the babies room needs to be set up....I've just been lazy.

My first baby shower was this past weekend and it was lovely. My friends did a great job planning and hosting it. So good that I cried when I walked in....but I loved every minute of it. It was a good turnout and I love my friends for going and being apart of it. :) I did realize that baby Jack is going to be surrounded by girls growing up because most of my friends have daughters....he is going to have so much fun! lol.

33 weeks today...it is going by so fast. 

Living in the moment

This weekend was a bit overwhelming....we are finally moved into our home! Crazy how the home I was raised in as a child, my little one will be raised in too. :) Everything is ready to be unpacked and hopefully I can get some decorating done. The last two days have been normal. Ram and I have lived together before for two years so I guess we are just already comfortable enough that it already feels normal.

I really appreciate my parents for everything they have been doing for us! Love y'all. Also, my grandma, uncle, mom, and sisters for helping clean and unpack Saturday along with my brother helping us move! I already know I was a pain that day....

I am 32 weeks tomorrow and now I am really antsy. We are awaiting your arrival baby Jack! Middle name has still not been chosen. I refuse to leave it as Jack Munguia. I always liked my middle name and since Ram picked Jack then I pretty much get to decide the middle name, but I still would like for Ram to like it. 

I am very excited for this weekend because it is my first baby shower! Love my friends for wanting to throw this for me! Y'all are the best!

Update!

I am 29 weeks today....I can not believe time has flown by so fast. My lil' man is almost ready for his debut! :)

We are hopefully moving into the house by the end of this month/beginning of August. Just depends what Ram's schedule is for his workshops.

Baby shower #1 is at the end of the month! Excited. I love my friends that wanted to do this for me! They are the best.

Baby shower #2 is in works. Still working on trying to find a venue. Need to hurry it is next month!

Baby shower #3 I am not sure will even happen anymore. I will just have to see what my lovely sister Bianca wants to do.

Need to go to the gym more to walk. The heat just makes me not want to go outside at all let alone try to walk for an hour. 

The buying process has begun. My dad already bought my crib and changer for me (love him) and my mom has HER cradle and some cute clothes that will apparently stay with her. She's funny.They will be awesome grandparents!

Ram and I went to Babies-R-Us to update our registry and it was a bad idea giving him the gun! lol He went crazy and started to disagree with me about the things I already had on there!!  It's cute he is excited though and wants to be apart of that process. We bought tiny size 0 shoes for my maternity shoot coming up....they are too adorable!

I am always hungry! :) I am sure I packed on the pounds since my last doctor visit. Guess I will find out on Friday which will also be the day I take my Glucose test. BLAGH!

Baby Jack kicks like crazy now. I could have sworn that when we were watching Sucker Punch he was doing his own little action moves inside my belly at the same time the movie had some! It was crazy. Now I can actually see my belly move. Not to the extreme, but I do notice little pulses. I haven't even met him and already he is the cutest baby ever!

Maui 2011

 Our trip to Maui was amazing! The weather was great too compared to Texas heat! The only thing that was missing was Ram. Wish he could have gone with me and my family, but we can always go again. :) Here are some of the pics I took with my iPhone. There were plenty more I took with my new Olympus PEN....I just have not uploaded them yet.

26 weeks today!

Baby Jack has started to kick and punch his mama all the time now. He doesn't like showing off to anybody just yet, but he sure is beating me up from the inside. I catch myself yelling at my tummy for him to stop. I do it a lot at work and my co-worker, Jessica, looks at me funny. Sometimes I don't even realize it. :) Ram has felt him though and it's cute to see his face light up and get excited when his baby boy starts to move. For that second, the joy I see in his eyes makes my day. He's going to get a lot more attention from the girls too (ggrrrr...lol). I hope they know I am the ONLY girl in their lives though!

Shower Planning is in Session

It is June and months back I had planned on having two showers in July and one in August. So guess what that means....Busy, Busy, Busy!

So far two are a-go! There is still one that we have not discussed yet so I guess we will wait and see. I am so excited about my first theme and colors. I am also so blessed to have friends that are willing and wanting to throw a baby shower for me! :) Love them.

I am already trying to think of what I will wear! lol.

On a sad note, Ram leaves tomorrow =(  This is going to be a hard month and a half because we will probably see each other for a total of 10-15 days....I'm going to miss him so much, but it is a great opportunity for him. I love you, babe!

June? Already?

There is so much to do before the arrival of our baby and before we move into our house. There are little nic-nacs here and there that need to be done, but I just don't know where to get started. My brain is running at 100 mph and it won't slow down. I need to pack up my life and transfer it over to the next chapter in my life, still need to get things before Hawaii, baby shower planning has arrived, I need to get systems installed in the house....so on and so forth! I just feel a tad bit overwhelmed right now that I just don't want to do anything. I go home and I know I have a lot to do, but instead I lay in bed and sleep if I can. I guess I am trying to avoid everything as much as I can. =) I'll get to it eventually.

I go to another doctor visit tomorrow. Nothing special I don't think. I do need to tell them that it hurts when I yawn. I am not real sure if that is normal, but it does hurt from time to time and since I don't know what it could mean I have to let them know.


Baby Jack has been kicking pretty often now. I wish I could explain the feeling, but to know that is our baby in there growing is pretty amazing. I look at my sonogram pictures and I can't stop smiling. My mommy friends were right...there is nothing like being a mother. No greater feeling. I haven't even held my baby yet and I already am in love. 

New blog design!!

Check out my new blog design by Munchkin Land Designs . She did a great job and showed great customer service! Thanks again, Jenn.

On another note, I am 24 weeks today and Hawaii is in 21 days!

We are getting ready to move into our house too! :) Everything is starting to look up!  I see myself getting more excited with each passing day.

Out with the old....

Family garage sale tomorrow.

Started to clean house and just want to get rid of some of this stuff. Especially before we move.

I hope I make some money. I am putting a lot of effort into this garage sale. Not just a spur of the moment thing. I had this date set for a month now, posted it on Craigslist, facebook and now here. I will be buying some actual signs. None of this "cardboard" stuff. Lord knows I need some money......Hawaii trip is coming up! I have a busy night a head of me putting prices on everything...plus I will be getting up at 6-7am, more to wake Ram and my brother up to move furniture, but also to set up. :)

Wish Me Luck!!

Super-size me!

Everything is a size bigger. Not only have I been carrying the baby weight in my stomach, but my boobs are huge and now my butt and thighs!!! Ugh! And of course I am only going to get bigger. It is the time to "pack on the pounds"....so I hear. This is the time the baby really starts to gain weight. I don't know how I am going to be on a plane for 8 hours let alone walking constantly in Hawaii! I will be in my 7th month [for those that don't really know - Julianna - a full-term pregnancy is a total of 10 months (40 weeks)] and I will be huge!

Anyway, I haven't really been eating too healthy and I haven't been exercising at all. So, I need to get on that! Plus, I think when Ramiro leaves for his conferences I'll probably be exercising a lot more to keep me busy!

Missing my baby

So I have not seen Ram all week because he has been busy with the Latino Film Festival going on at the Fort Worth Rose Marine Theater. A great opportunity for him, but it leaves no time for me. =( If I can't handle one week how am I supposed to handle an entire summer with out him?? He is going to be gone a good 6 weeks sporadically out of the summer for his Photography conferences. Then I will be gone one week for Hawaii!
It is going to be a rough summer for us, but I hope we pull through because when he is finally back that last month of pregnancy is going to be hell! I hope he is prepared! lol. I tell him he is lucky he won't have to put up with most of my bitching and whining during the hot summer.......but after he is back he is not leaving for a while!!!!

Stare me down

I have realized that everyone is going to give their opinion whether you want it or not. Some will judge because I am not married while others embrace the new generation of families and are happy for you. It is usually, the old-fashioned strangers who grew up a certain way that tend to think that pregnancy outside of marriage is wrong. I am looked down upon for it. I feel like a stereotypical, Hispanic woman who is just a breeding machine when I get these stares. Did I not get my college degree from a well-recognized school in Texas? Do I not have a good job? Am I not an independent woman? Luckily, I have family and friends that support me and are happy for me. Everyone is excited!

The only thing that matters is that I am a good mother and I am happy. You can stare all you want, but it won't affect me! :)

P.S. MIDDLE NAMES SUCK! If it were up to Ram, he would name our kid after The Lion King! Thank goodness I'm the boss ;-) Love you babe!

Strain on my brain!

I may be a little over my head when it comes to planning out my finances. I have an "Expenses" spread sheet that I keep up with weekly and I have everything mapped out all the way until Dec. That would make me anal wouldn't it? Well, it helps me keep track of bills I need to pay and how much savings I have put away. Great!

Here is the stressful part: I am going to Hawaii next month and I want to be able to enjoy myself without stressing about spending too much money. Plus I need to buy things here before going. It scares me because I worry about what will happen when the baby is here. Other things that have been eating at my brain are the bills once we get to the house. Ram has rent covered, but then there is electricity, water, internet, cable and etc. Things I have not thought about until today!! If everything goes according to plan, we will move into our own place by late June/early July. It is not that I am worried on whether or not I can afford them, I am worried about my maternity leave and whether I will have enough saved to still pay my bills and help with whatever else. Had my job been a bigger company that offered benefits then maternity leave wouldn't be a problem - I would get it paid, but only certain people are lucky enough to obtain a job like that straight after college.

Ugh....I am just doing what I do best - Stressing! So many things are going through my mind and what I need to do to prepare for this baby. I had a vision today that when I go into labor and can't do anything for about 2 days, I will be stressing over what bills I have to pay for that week. Ridiculous, I know! It was just a bad thought.

I pray that things will fall into place and go according to plan or even better.

Healthy Eating

I have not been eating healthy. Other than being reminded of my walnuts and Omega-3 pills, I am not utilizing the most natural foods to my benefit. I find it difficult when I work 6 days a week because during lunch I want something quick and after work I am going to want something quick. I am too tired and lazy to go grocery shopping. I'm a little worried too because I rarely snack. When I'm full, I'm full and won't eat until my next meal usually. Well, it is time to change all that. I am starting to worry a lot. If something, anything, were to be wrong with my baby I would blame myself and never forgive myself. It is hard to think about.

I'm late, but it is time to step up my game. My baby needs me and all the nutrition to be healthy. It is all for you my baby boy! :)

It's A Boy!

I am filled with so much joy! Nothing can ruin my moment as a mommy-to-be!

Regrets

My main regret now that the baby is on the way is not putting my degree to good use. I was mainly worried about money then happiness and now I have to deal with the consequences. I wish I would have searched harder for a job that was more stable, offered benefits and made me happy. Then I wouldn't have to worry about what will happen after the baby is here. If I were to continue my search after the baby, I feel like I would have to limit myself now because I will have a family to think about. Everyone tells me, "Right now, in this economy, at least you have a job". Maybe I should think of it in those terms and be grateful for what has been put in front of me. However, better believe if I have to stay locally in the next upcoming years that I will be on my way to a T.V. producer.

Family Values

Almost 18 weeks and the bump has sprouted out of no where in the last week. My aunts love to make fun of me, because unlike them I have no idea what it is like to be really big so I am complaining, being lazy, and using pregnancy as an excuse. I think it is a perfect excuse :)  They say I have no idea. I told them I was going to try to be as natural as I can, but they said "Don't try to be brave for anyone. Take the epidural". My grandmother, on the other hand, wants me to suffer and go through the pain. Not out of spite, but so I can see what it feels like and maybe not want another one. My aunts said that didn't stop my mother after me. lol. They are crazy. :)

My youngest aunt and uncle have told me they would adopt my child if I am not ready and my grandmother and other uncle have said the same thing. It won't happen, but to know had I been younger in a more stressful situation that they would do that for me and the baby makes me happy. I love them. Despite their sarcastic remarks they love me and are there for me. AND now, they will be there for the baby too. This baby will have nothing to worry about. My baby will feel so much love and I am so grateful of that.

I know I will be very happy with my little family. Ram has shown me so much and continues to prove to me how much my worth is. I can't describe how happy he makes me. And in the past couple of months, I have been very confident in knowing he is going to be a great daddy. I can't wait to start the next chapter in our lives.

16 weeks and counting

This Friday I will be going to my 3rd doctor visit. I think they will be doing a 3-D scan of the baby to see if the baby's lip is forming okay. We have a history of cleft pallets in my family and the doctor just wants to check. However, I have yet to get a sonogram picture that I can take home and after talking to a lot of people they said they had one their first visit. :( Well, I am going to ask for one and maybe they will be able to tell if it is a boy or girl. Or twins....if not then I'll have to wait another month.

I feel like the growth of the baby is happening so fast. I am 16 weeks and according to my time-line, I should be able to feel the baby kick soon....? I am not even that big. One of my friends told me its not real to her until she sees my stomach fully grown. I understand that. It is kind of how I feel. I don't know how I'll be able to feel the baby kick if I am barely able to see a stomach. I am naive. I know this, but it is still so unreal to me. I wonder all the time who the baby will look like. Both sides have pretty strong genes. I really hope the baby comes out looking like Ram so I can fall in love all over again especially if it is a boy. Will the baby have my Chinese eyes? His dimples? My nose? his smile? Whatever the baby will look like, I just hope he/she's healthy.

I start to see myself get excited day after day. I can't wait for the little one to get here. He/she has no idea how much they are already loved by so many. :)

Wedding Bell Blues

This morning as I was going through my bills, I found an invitation addressed to me. Usually my friends let me know if I will be getting a invitation for a birthday party or any event they're planning. That way I can keep an eye out for it. This time no one notified me so I had no idea what it could be.Well, I open it and the first thing it says is "Save the Date". ANOTHER one of my friends is getting married! Don't get me wrong, I am so happy and excited for both of them, but there is a part of me that is sad because I know I won't be able to plan a wedding until later on. That was supposed to be my next step. Instead we have a little surprise awaiting us now. If we were to get married any time soon, it wouldn't be anywhere close to the wedding I want. Which I can live with, but one day I hope I am still able to have that.

On a good note, the baby let me eat a slice of pizza today! :)

Sick of being tired

I find myself tired all the time now. In the morning, I don't want to get up. After work, I just want to go to sleep. My room is a mess and food isn't even the highlight of my day because depending on what I want to eat I will most likely get sick. I usually have a "bad hair day" everyday because I don't feel like messing with it (plus I need a haircut) and makeup is just a hassle. I told myself I wanted to be a cute pregnant woman...well...right now, I just feel like crap. Whoever said "Pregnancy is bliss" was wrong! AND when am I supposed to "Glow"? Apparently, my boyfriend is "glowing like a pregnant woman" according to his friend while I look pale. I am sure it will get better, just right now....I feel and look ugly.

So, I was reading the 14 weeks update on a pregnancy website and it said that if my baby is a girl, she will already have 2 million eggs in her ovaries and that I am really preparing to be a grandmother.....Excuse me?! I haven't even prepared to be a mother, but now I am supposed to be a grandmother! Is there a way to spay/neuter your children like we can with our pets?? lol. I think we should have the power to decide that. That may be dumb for me to say, but the fear of teenage pregnancy is going through my mind. I guess I just have to pray that we raise our child right.

-Michelle

4 months!

My name is Michelle. I am 23 years old, recent graduate from TCU, I've been with my boyfriend for 5 years and now... pregnant with my first child. Let me just start off by saying the pregnancy wasn't expected. I had so many ambitions and dreams I wanted to accomplish before I wanted to start a family. The news struck me pretty hard and it is sad to say I was very selfish in the beginning. So many thoughts were going through my mind that "confused" wasn't even the right word to describe how I was feeling. After getting over my initial emotions and thoughts, I realized that I am still able to accomplish my dreams just now I'll have a beautiful baby on my arm. I think the baby will even bring me more drive to accomplish all that I want to so that I can help provide a better life for them.

All was fine and dandy until the sickness, stomach pains and inflation of my stomach started to happen. In the beginning, I had a little nausea here and there and the doctor said stomach pains were normal. Now, hovering over the toilet at random times of the day is the story of my life. This kid is a picky eater! May be childish to say that, but what do you expect from a woman who didn't want kids until her 30s and adopt at that! I find myself talking to my stomach at random times telling the baby to calm down and not to make mommy sick. :) Doesn't help! Then came the "mommy" jeans. I started wearing those at three months because I was so bloated and wearing my other jeans started to hurt. My mom and aunts were surprised I was even wearing them because I wasn't even showing. But they are SO much more comfortable.

The hormones are driving me crazy too. I snap at random times and crying is a new habit. My mom has to constantly remind my brother and sisters to be nice to me. It is quite funny. My boyfriend seems to be handling it pretty well. I snapped at him once, but realized my mistake because I shouldn't have and apologized. He sure does try to feed me a lot though. Oh, and he is on me about taking my OMEGA 3 vitamins. It helps with the brain tissue and he wants our baby to be a baby genius. It is cute actually. Now, I am 4 months and I am starting to see a little belly bump. The reality of it has sunk and I feel like it is crunch time. It is time to prepare for a home, the baby shower, so on and so forth. At this point in time, my boyfriend and I live separately. We are hoping to rent a house before the baby comes and I am praying things fall into place.

Well, that is where I'm at right now.....happy, sick and hormonal.

-Michelle